Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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