I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
