p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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