somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
