he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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