I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
