I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize