i already hear my dad disowning me
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
she smelled like a LAN party
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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