whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
