To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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