he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize