You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
