I never want to see another naked old woman again.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
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