We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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