Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize