Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
whose ass print is on the piano?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize