After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize
