am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
