Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Randomize
