she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
