she was so not down for the gang bang
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
