She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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