i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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