My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
