my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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