Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
