whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
