8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize