I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Just invented taco cereal.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
