last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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