these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
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And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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