I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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