yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
