please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize