quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
