it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.