yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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