Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
