girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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