dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Randomize
