He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
