nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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