doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
