I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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