The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
