i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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