She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
What a dumb baby whore.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize