O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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