Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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