I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
