flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
