i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
