i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize